I can’t recall the last time I saw a number like that. Of course I had stopped doing this for quite a while but even when I started again the number wasn’t that.

One of the things I’ve battled recently is poor lab work. I wasn’t surprised considering the 10/4 schedule and stress etc etc etc anyhoo my blood sugar came back like bitch you know you fat right? I used to be proud that I was a fat chick with perfect labs. Then age and length of time being hard on my body showed up in 2020 like warning Will Robinson. I made a lot of changes then and my numbers went back to normal. I went on living my life and eventually old habits returned and this time when I saw the numbers I was a little depressed.

I felt like I was back where I was and losing traction. I didn’t stay depressed though.. I went to work and the work I am doing now is sustainable. Just like the first time my goal is to not end up on insulin or meds for the rest of my life.. One more time where I don’t want to be Esther. Assuming I can continue on this path I won’t. Shit I might end up better than before, in a way.

The Valley is good for me even if it is also stressful in a way. I remind myself that I designed myself to be solo and being here is a shock to the system. I need the support though, the coaching the love and proximity. It is healing in more ways than it is stress.

I am proud of you Nicole. Keep Going