Philly Nicole peeked from behind her barrier today. It took a lot to reign her back in but I did it. By 430p I really thought it was a wrap and she was just going to emerge and be there, but I distracted her and put her back into her safe room.

It started at the end of last week when we got the word the CEO was coming to our offices. Now that is not a big deal to some, it is not even a big deal to me if I am being transparent. I’ve sat at the same table as a sitting President, the CEO of a bank…meh. It became a big deal along the way as it was clear that my supervisors were on edge. I know a part of why they are on edge, and the part I know I will keep to myself. The details of that are not important, what matters is the 2nd part. He’s a pistol, he is the devil, he is…..

He is a man, who just happens to be the top of the food chain at my current gig. I’ve never not taken and opportunity and as things go with me sometimes I was speaking with a co worker about talking to the CEO and it became super clear, super fast that the people who monitor me day to day came to the decision that I should not be any where near the CEO. That pretty much assured that the man I would otherwise ignore became a top priority.

As the days went by and it became even more clear that they wanted to segregate me I began to make a list of things that I wanted to talk to him about. My first opportunity would have been yesterday, but they made sure that I worked from home. I made multiple offers, and the consistent response was no. I told the work wife, that simply means that I will meet him tomorrow without a doubt.

This morning it happened in the parking lot. I was grabbing the work bag looked up and there he was. I introduced myself, had a brief conversation, and then into the office to sign in. I asked him to return to my department if his schedule allowed. I began the day on a high, proving that which I know the Universe….

The rest of the morning was spent doing regular work, until the big guy kept his word and came to our office in the building. The supervisors flocked to him putting a barrier, or so they thought, between us, but our conversation continued, and I got them – the supervisors – to ask the questions they didn’t want me asking. I’d played chess and won.

My chest was puffed out, my head big. That happens from time to time, me being less than humble.

We had lunch, and then things started moving. A co worker shared a story of their past and the response of the yt women who run the place, well it didn’t sit well with me. It wasn’t necessarily actionable, but still rubbed me the wrong way.

Then while checking my email a response from the attorney. He isn’t coming to the trial. Word? In the back of my mind I asked if it were a strategy. She was not at his, he not at hers. The united front they previously displayed was being dismantled. I also wondered if it was the result of the health issue. I still have questions about that, but l also know that it will be revealed to me if I need to know and in the meantime trust the process. The issue with that is, I have questions for him. Questions in relation to the trial. The personal questions I have I will not ask.

That sent me off on the path where I almost let Philly Nicole out the door. As I recalled the audacity of this declaration after my morning, took me to a place where I really wanted to ask…do you know who the fuck I am?

I’ve offered 3 times to leave things with her. She’s refused every time. You’ve put me in a position where I have to prepare for trial, and I have.

The work wife peeped my mood shift and I gave an abbreviated retelling of the Story of Us.

In the retelling of the story, I was reminded of the time when people went out of our way to keep him and I apart, even Kalifornia Karen. Perhaps especially Kalifornia Karen.

I was reminded of WHY that was a thing, and the power of us when we finally did.

Work wife asked why she felt that way. I know but that is the story to be painted in the trial.

I did respond eventually. This is not a request.